Acceptance

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acceptance, accepting what is, Believing, challenge, courage, Courageous Vulnerability, dyslexic, empathy, evolve, faith, growth, love, Soul to Soul, spirit, transformation

After all this time I have come to accept that being dyslexic is actually my super power. For so long I have hidden this aspect of myself and did not even know what it was or that there was a name for why I saw things, spoke the way I did or wrote the way I did. All this time I just lived with the shame and humiliation that there was something wrong with me or that I was just not intelligent enough. 

And now, I am opening myself up to simply accepting it as something that has truly been an asset and as a secret super power. Yes, my brain works differently than others but because of this I see, sense and experience the world in a way that has heightened me being an empath and healer that I am. Not to mention the creativity that I bring to making dances and building kinetic worlds. 

The other rather interesting thing that has come of coming out as dyslexic is that I have successfully built skills to work with it and through it to write and express myself better. The 30 day challenges I have given myself have helped to simply practice these skills and to build confidence in making small shifts in my courage to write. 

We know that we are able to change neural pathways and use neuroplasticity as a tool for remapping and relearning things. Because of this, folks don’t have to suffer in silence or believe themselves to be inferior or broken. It’s like many things we hide to avoid shame but in reality, if we open ourselves up, we find it possible to heal and to work through what is in fact solvable. 

What would it be like if we supported so many others on whatever journey they were on? What would it be like if we lead with acceptance and love rather than expectation and fear? Would we not all be more open and supportive? Would our lives be that much less difficult? It seems to me we all could live with a lot less trauma and a lot more acceptance. 

Why is it we as human beings feel a need to only feel safe when we are all the same? Why do we do this to one another? What is so comforting about being like everyone else and othering those that we don’t understand or fear? Don’t we in fact learn so much from our differences and grow because of them? 

I know for me there would have been a lot less mountains of healing to climb would I really have known that all of who I was/am was always good enough and embraced. If I was to say anything to my younger self it would be to not fear who I am and to live unabashedly unashamed. Live loud. Live big. And most of all, love yourself like no one could ever love you. 

Perhaps we all could find it within ourselves to encourage this in ourselves and in all of those we come into contact with. Perhaps we could practice acceptance and sometimes learn to live with what makes us uncomfortable at times. There is a lot the body can teach us when we lean into our discomfort and find out what is hiding within that. 

More and more I try to find out what is lurking in the uneasiness that needs my attention. Facing those moments and bringing them into my awareness is where the transformation happens. And trust me, there is a lot of transformation still to happen. 

I have found that admitting who I really was and facing what being dyslexic meant was a moment of great freedom and oddly great pride. Like many things in my life, I am relearning how to live with great pride and acceptance of the fullness of my being. 

A Return to Being

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Believing, Conscious Living, courage, Earth, earth knowledge, nature, Soul to Soul, trees, walk, walking, walking into ourselves, well being, wellness, yoga

I have long found great peace and connection with nature. I have long had a relationship with philosophies that hold nature and the earth in its main focus. To say I feel with the earth and its energies would be very much in line with my deepest sensitivity. 

A return to walking in the woods a few years ago was in many ways a return to myself. The self that had gotten lost in the hustle and bustle of building a career, meeting the requirements of imposed success and the notion that I had to prove my worth and talent by packing the resume and annual report. 

It has been nice resetting boundaries and reclaiming the things that had slipped away and were really important to the well balanced being I was hoping I was. A return to wellderness has been such a delight and healing thing returning to my body and my soul. Oddly, the space that COVID insisted on was in some ways supportive of this healing. 

In no way am I suggesting the pandemic was in any way positive, especially in light of all who lost their lives, livelihoods and struggled to move forward in their lives. What I am saying is that I am grateful for the choices I made for myself and my life because of the situation in which we were going through. 

When the time came that we were able to get back to a sense of normalcy in our lives it felt super important to honor the gift of being ever more present in my own. Walking, swimming, yoga and meditation has exponentially increased in my life and I am so grateful for the research and work that has come of it. That and the soulful return to the great outdoors and the return of a fellowship with nature. 

I am grateful for this moment and honored to be able to be present and share this experience with my boys as well. They do so love their walks among the trees on a daily basis. We all are able to enjoy this moment and to continue to deepen our love for one another and for this earth. 

Every Now and Then

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Conscious Living, quiet, quiet heart, quiet mind, quiet reflection, quieting the heart, quieting the mind, relinquishing

There are times when I slip into a silent space falling into a void of uncertainty and unknowing. My mind wonders about choices, paths and stories lost to the past. Although I am present, the open space begins to fill with questions. 

During these days I do my best to simply breathe and be ever more present without judgement or guilt. I can’t possibly know if the choices were right or wrong. I can’t see the end of the path nor rewrite stories lost. All I can do is just breathe the moment and relinquish my body to this space. 

Perhaps this is a symptom of again and something everyone experiences along the way of maturity and growth. Perhaps it is a good thing that there is this reflective time often experienced with tears. Perhaps this is the recalibration of energy and emotion to allow a moment and space for a new beginning. 

So I move through the motions of the day with conscious movement and breath in order to find my grounding and sense of anchoring during what feels like a downpour of unknowing. Sensing and listening through my feet seems to be the only way to make sense of it all. 

Sense of the insensible.