Celebrating Change

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, bliss, choice, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, healing, health, heart, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, learning, life, light, love, Love Between Men, loving, patience, peace, Soul to Soul, universal heart, Vulnerable, well being, wellness

There is a lot to be said for navigating dark waters. It’s scary. It’s difficult. There never seems to be movement forward. It’s exhausting both physically and mentally. It often feels as if this is the worst thing that could possibly be happening.

Yet, ironically, this is the best time. This is a time of the unknown. This is literally a gift that is signaling immense change and immense growth. This is actually a time to celebrate. This is a time of great healing that will transform your life for the better and create a new opportunity that will welcome joy, happiness, love and light.

This is your time. The is the time of new beginnings. This is a time of storing the murky water to actually allow it to settle more clearly. It is not the time to fight or to struggle. That never works in quick sand nor does it work in times of darkness. What does work is a change of focus and a change of mind.

Softly begin to shift how you see things. Gently allow yourself to celebrate your courage to actually welcome change. Recognize that you are a gentle warrior and your sword is that of love. For no matter what is happening, love will always pave the way with grace, dignity and light. No matter what, if you choose love as your point of view, at the end of your struggle you will be left with the love you invited in. And trust that love always wins. Especially when it comes to the love that is meant for you.

140 Days of Sitting

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, bliss, body, change, changes, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, Creative Flow, Creativity, Dance, development, Energy, faith, health, heart, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, learning, letting go, life, light, listening, love, Mindful Action, patience, peace, sharing, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, Teaching, universal consciousness, universal heart, well being, Wonder

Today marks the 140th day of a meditation practice that I began as a 40 day challenge. To say that this time has been transformative would be completely denying the fullness of what sitting in peace has done for me. I am incredibly grateful for choosing to sit and practice my spiritual journey and do so with a commitment I have not had in decades.

Somewhere along the way of becoming I got lost in the going. Dreams, desires and societal and cultural expectations simply knocked me off balance. That of course is understandable when we succumb to the illusion of the busyness of being. We are sold that to be busy is to be successful. To be busy is to be validated. This is especially true in academia where I live to butter my bread.

Drifting through a sea of disillusionment it is easy to get lost when the goals are not congruent or in alignment with the true vibration of you. We think to know and yet what matters most is that we should feel to know and better yet, understand. And as the rocks tumble in this avalanche of despair we are seeing all around us, we see and feel how fear seems to be getting the best of us.

I made a conscious choice to heal while Covid ravaged our very existence. In a time of heightened fear, I chose freedom. In a time of chaos, I chose quietude. In a time of heartbreak, I chose healing. This is the key element in allowing ourselves the time and space to heal ourselves of the hurt, shame, trauma and fear that we have been collecting as well as spreading. For one can’t but help hurt others of in fact they are hurt themselves. Choosing to break the cycle of pain takes the courage to make the choice for change.

I realize not everyone believes in meditation nor is it part of many belief systems. Yet, what is part of all spiritual paths is the simple thread of the power of love that is woven through them all. For me, meditation has been a way to return to loving myself and therefore all those around me. Perhaps your path is different in the form of finding oneself, but regardless, sitting in meditation and opening the magnetic field of love that emanates from the heart is what allows for magic, wonderment and awe.

There have been many transformative, synchronistic and enchanted moments during these past 140 days. For this my heart is grateful. My body is also grateful. In addition, the energy I live in continues to make me giddy with ecstasy like I have not felt in years.

From where I sit now, all I can see is possibility. As I heal, I grow. As I grow, I become. As I become, I am able to welcome all that is in true alignment with the most beautiful vibration of me and the me that I can be. I accept and allow to do more good, no, more great in the world. I have it to give. And so I shall.

Possibilities Abound

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, bliss, body knowledge, change, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, Courageous Vulnerability, Creative Flow, Creativity, development, Dream, Energy, faith, heart, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, learning, life, light, love, Magic, Mindful Action, peace, sharing, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, universal consciousness, universal heart, well being, Wonder

Since Covid I have found myself giving over to healing from so much of my past that I never allowed myself the time to heal from. Despite the horrific tragedy of the pandemic and all of the lives lost and devastating heartbreak, I committed to choosing healing the heart as a way of taking time to honor the space of this moment.

A few years into what I have deemed my heart work, I am so grateful I made that choice and stuck with it as life returned to a new normal. What didn’t return was the man I was pre-pandemic. And for all of this I am able to see the immense change in who I am, what I desire and what is truly possible when one begins living from the heart and unconditional love.

As I diligently engage my meditation practice, my affirmation practice, my running practice, my waking practice, my movement practices and even my hypnosis; I see the abundance of possibilities that are there for me. Not a day goes by or a dream expressed that I don’t see the potential for a whole new life, mind and way of living.

Decisions have been made for huge shifts and transformative opportunities which slowly begin to reveal themselves in so many synchronicities and ah ha moments. I have returned to so many instinctual remembrance’s that all whisper that this is the right direction and path for my voice of the heart to begin speaking and literally singing once again.

This is the time and I realize, now more than ever, that the work I do, share and creates are needed now. My sensitivity, empathy, compassion and love is needed now. In these challenging and very turbulent times, I am needed now. As are you.

If we are going to move the world into the space of love, we all are needed now. In all of the many different ways, being and becoming; we are all so desperately needed for a time of healing for ourselves and for one another. The earth needs us. Our hearts need us. All that you love needs us.

In acknowledging that you are needed and putting the energy and focus in that loving space; possibilities will abound. You are capable of magic and miracles. We all are capable of magic and miracles. I choose magic and miracles each and every day. And let me tell you, it is divine.

Sitting to Listen

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Believing, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, healing, heart knowledge, listening, listening to the body, listening to the heart, love, loving, Soul to Soul, spirit, well being, wellness

I have recently become aware of what my superpower is. In a Marvel Universe full of all the incredible beings saving everything in existence, I realize that in my marvelous reality I have none of the “powers” one would hope yet I possess the softest power of them all. After all of this time I am able to absorb, accept and be aware that my superpower is simply the ability to listen. 

I have been recognizing and becoming more aware of this quiet skill for some time now. It has taken a concerted effort to peel away the desire of our culture and society as a way of finally hearing the images, recognizing the omens and allowing for space to see my own truth. It has become clear to me that the notion of being a dancer, educator, choreographer, healer, singer and creative content provider are just simple reflections of what is actually within. 

Yes, I listen to what a dance needs when I am facilitating its creation so as to let it become what it needs and express what it needs to be. Yes, I hear with my eyes while looking at a sea of bodies in the studio while teaching so as to support the development and nurturing of bodies to become the vessel of the voices within. 

While healing, my hands become my ears as the body underneath them whispers what it needs and what is necessary to set free the energy to course correct and find harmony. The body’s ability to know what it needs and to be able to communicate this is crucial to its greatest health and well-being. 

I have been learning to sit in the company of others while emptying my mind of clutter and my heart of desire so that I might offer that space as a way of understanding and becoming keenly aware of what one’s heart needs. Similarly, I keep my heart open to hear who my dogs are and to allow them to share with me in their own ways what makes them safe, loved and appreciated. 

In my walking I have learned to hear what the earth has to say by letting her speak through my feet. With the mysteries of time she holds deeply within, each footfall unfolds it’s secrets and it’s heartache. Simultaneously, nature that surrounds me on these adventures also beckons to be heard so as to share its knowledge and magic as well. 

I have worked towards sitting in silence to open up my own heart so I can more deeply understand the darkness within and learn to untangle, unravel and “rewrite” a life lost in the quest to become an adult. Ironically I knew as a young boy I wanted to be an “idea guy”, someone who shared ideas and created things for companies. I didn’t have the words then or the awareness to realize at the time that I enjoyed listening and creating and doing so gave me so much joy. I instinctively knew my superpower but had no idea what that meant inside a world of noise full of the nonsense that strangles our hearts. 

So I have returned to being that child and to understand that what I knew deep within came from just being who I was and “naively” being true to what spoke to my heart and evoked joy. I strive to sit and listen in silence now so as to catch a whisper of the Divine as a way of recognizing the divine within. As I empty, I begin to glimpse the relationship of I AM. 

So what is your superpower? What is it that allows you to be the greatest you and an incredible contributor to a better life, a radiant love and a healer of this earth? Go ahead, I’m listening. 

Thirty Day’s of Thoughts: Day 10

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changes, compassion, faith, family, gender, learning, lessons learned, life, love, Love Between Men, love for all, me, norms, observations, sexuality, Trans, truth

I find it difficult to understand people that fear the differences in others. I truly do. I am not sure why I didn’t get that gene that allows us to hate one another simply because there might be differences or that I should fear others simply because I don’t understand or see them for who they are.

In light of all of the trans-phobia that seems to be being stirred I find this especially difficult as it is wasted energy on something that has little to no significance in anyones life except for the pain inflicted on those who identify as trans or gender fluid. What does it matter how one identifies oneself or has come to understand the peace they feel when the find a safe place and an identity that works for them? It doesn’t matter to your life one bit. Not one single bit.

When I reflect on my life and who it is I am, I am continually reminded of how much I had to hide my identity so to avoid the hatred and negativity. Ironically, I didn’t have to hide it all that much as I suspect many others around me clearly knew that there was something a little different. I mean how many young men ride the bus with their football team and are able to engage them in a victory sing along? Yes, that did happen. And yes, the young men, in their boisterous song made me strong.

What really stands out to me is a moment when I was named a female label by my nephew. Yes, my nephew somehow was confused by what he should call me or what was expected. Although I am not so sure he was confused at all. This child was clear about one thing, this relative was not like the others. What was interesting is that he insisted on calling me Auntie Scott. A female title followed by a male name.

Mind you, he would do this without batting an eye. It was as if this was as normal as Uncle Lee who was my brother. And yet, something was different. And it was. He was right. There was something not only different from a labeling standpoint of me being gay, but something energetically different and understandable to him and how he related to me. I was all things to him. Not all of this, and not all of that. I was in between.

Ironically, this never once bothered me. It bothered my sister a bit, but not too terribly much. I think she wanted to do her best to correct him, which she did, but something about it, something within him would not let it go. And so, it stuck. For some time I was Auntie Scott until he made the decision to follow the societal path and recognize gender as static or linear.

So life went on. Nothing harmed. I was fine. He was fine. We all were fine. And love still surrounded us all regardless.

These days I find myself using all kinds of varied pronouns and gender descriptions. One of my dearest friends and I call one another Sista or Gurl. He even refers to me to his dogs as Auntie. Seems as though there is something significant about that title that will stick with me a life time. And as it should. Perhaps I am an Auntie to those that need me to be such. Perhaps I am an uncle to others. None the less, I am still me.

I am a gay male who identifies himself as someone who lives in the in between. I live in a space of love and can love anyone I choose. I have relationships with men who inspire and energetically add to my well being. I express my love physically in ways that matter only to us. It is a private matter of love and affection shown in ways that satisfy the physical manifestation of love and light. It matters nothing to you. Just as yours matters not to me.

I suffer not because of who you are. In actuality I benefit greatly as the more others are able to find peace with themselves and how they see themselves in this world, the more peace there is. And the more peace there is, the more love. And if you need someone to see you as you, you have a safe place with me. There are safe places in this world so seek them out. Seek those people out who will love you and see you as who you are. Surround yourself with the kind of people who show the love and light of this universe. There you will find peace and there you will learn to love yourself for all that you are. Perfect!

Taking up the Journey of Acceptance

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acceptance, admiration, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, bliss, body, choice, compassion, courage, heart, human condition, humanity, inspiration, Kindness, love, Support

I write today from a place of admiration and pride about my experience yesterday getting coffee at a Starbucks near my gym. I just finished a wonderful swim and was heading on to my next appointment and desired a little afternoon iced coffee before venturing forward on my to do list. A regular occurrence for most of us during our regular routines and daily experiences.

Today however shifted my perspective. Today I walked up to the counter and quickly realized, after the assumption that there was a young female behind the register, that in fact, it was a transgendered person. Upon that moment my heart just ripped out of my chest with joy simply because of the courage of this person to be standing in their glory at work and in such a public and vulnerable place. Immediately my admiration for this person and my pride in who they are went through the roof.

We exchanged our business; me placing my order and them taking my money and sharing it with the barista. In this moment I began to have admiration for the entire group of people who were working at the time and my heart applaud the fact that we were there in a store with all kinds of people who supported and worked side by side with this person helping to give strength and lift up the courage of a group of people to be proud of all that they all are. At this moment I could not send out loving energy to them all and whisper in from my heart how inspired I was by them all.

Writing this today I am congratulating the transgendered person for their courage and their strength to be who they are in the midst of their everyday life. Being strong enough and proud enough to be who they are. You inspired me with your acceptance of yourself and in turn allow those around you to accept you as a human being full of love and light. Nothing more. Nothing less. You inspired me to have the courage to take up the journey of acceptance for all of those around me at all times.

I honor those colleagues and that store and company for having the courage to raise up the human condition and lift it up to a community during a time of great tension. I applaud this small yet significant success and see it as an example to do the same with all of those around me as well. How might I do this for my students, my friends, my colleagues and even strangers. How might I have the courage to accept more and see everyone as loving energy? How might I weave this powerful and inspiring moment into my everyday life?

And then I wonder, how is it we all can do this? Is it possible for us to see everyone around us with the energy of love and accept them as a fellow and equal human being? Is it possible to accept one another through love? I think so. In this way I see no good or bad, right or wrong or better or worse. We are equal. We are the same. We are love. And if we do this, perhaps we are building the kind of world where all of us will prosper, love and become all that we could and are meant to be.

As I move forward in my day today, may I carry this inspiration with me. May I share it in my actions and in my heart with everyone I encounter. May I honor everyone simply by seeing them as who they are. May I accept all things through love as I take up the challenge and this journey of acceptance. May I be a warrior for the human condition seeing it with my heart and allowing it with love.

One Word Week

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, change, compassion, Conscious Living, empathy, equality, graciousness, harmony, justice, love, peace, respect, seeing others, sharing, supporting

In the wake of all of this goodness, I have been so amazed by the noise that surrounds it all. Saying this isn’t commenting on the perceived positive or negative noise that always surrounds the shifting of times, but rather the amount of outpouring and claiming through celebration. Again, this is not a comment on the pride or needed exhale, but rather watching in wonderment of it all.

And yet, I am realizing for myself that I am absorbing our changing world in a very different way. For me it has been one of great internal reflection. I have observed the amazing things that have been occurring and have been digesting them into my being simply because I often can’t believe that they have actually occurred. If I can swallow them into my body and consume the joy within perhaps I can better believe that they are happening as they have become a physical part of me somehow.

In light of all of this, I have decided to use only one word this week to describe the feelings or thoughts that have been occurring as I process all that has transpired. I am calling it “One Word Week” simply distilling what I need to by choosing only one word rather than a rant or exchange. In doing so I hope to quiet those around me to enter into the simplicity of joined thought while contemplating more quietly through a focused and directed emotion. I realize I always connect better with those around me and those I love when I share what is in the moment without anything extra; stripping away unnecessary noise so that the connection is better tasted due to its simplicity of flavor.

So as I move forward this week I will express in a very succinct way and look forward to the ways in which those around me respond to the dialing back and humbling of the emotions. In addition, I am also very aware that the way we respond to change will help us better to change the other necessary and long over due shifts that need to happen immediately in our country. If we celebrate to loudly or wildly, the noise drowns out  and detracts us from addressing the pressing needs of our brothers and sisters who are also fighting battles of equality and justice. We are all not free until we are all free. We are all not legal until we all are legal. We are all not equal until we all are equal. It is a quieting respect that we offer even in times of great celebration. Our graciousness in the way we celebrate will help to let others know that we will fight along side them as well.

My One Word Week began yesterday with the word love. Simple and profound. Yet universal and necessary and needed for all. Join me in this directed expression and see what happens to your feed or to your exchanges. See what happens when we create a bridge through simple words and thoughts so as to bring people together even if they do not think or feel the same. If we create a platform to welcome others to the table for discussion while seeing them through a simple idea, perhaps we can begin to bring in more love as the walls will have come down. I wonder if we can disarm the fear and anger by simplifying the exchange?

Lightening the Being

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, Courageous Vulnerability, diversity, equality, justice, porous, present

Leaving behind the past to flow in the great mystery of the present.

So porous the heart that the light and love of the world flows through.

There is buoyancy in a body free from the burden of holding on to the weight of fear.

When there is no longer a need for value or rank, the soul touches equality as the veil of division fades away.

Seeing in all Directions/Walking Along the Center Line

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Balance, becoming, beleif, Believing, body, body knowledge, change, choice, compassion, Conscious Living, dreams, EBAS, Energy, humanity

We live our lives moving forward. in motion in one direction seeing only what is in front of us and desiring what is so far beyond ourselves. Would it not be more dimensional if we started living in all directions forcing us to anchor ourselves and our energies by the center line of our beings?  Our spines and the very core of our being, and ways of being, would be engaged in a sense of ascending and descending reaching in order to stabilize this new sense of seeing and being.

In doing so, we might find a surge of energy and creativity focusing and reconnecting damaged pathways that have occurred by living a life focused on a future. We might find a sense of internal opening and awakening as we find the balance of our internal and external selves as we allow and acknowledge ourselves as the center of our humanity and the inspiration of our dreams. The radiant body becomes the very thing that grounds our existence. Simply by seeing in all directions, we find our electric selves charged by a new sense of existing and enter a life long journey of walking along the center line.

Seeing One Another in this Place and Finding Humanity in our Space

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allowing, art, Balance, beleif, Believing, bliss, choice, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, humanity

Human lives are statements about our galaxies. Full of magical stories, mystical memories and a history rich in ritual; our inexplainable moments at the micro level reflect the wonderful magnificence at the macro level. Logic and reason never able to outshine the simple power of faith.

Humanity is our being in this world. Not our overthinking in it. It is imperative that we connect with our consciousness by not limiting ourselves to the mere hallow experience of information. Mindless motion void of understanding from the heart limits the very voice of our being. We must be careful of giving information more favor or value than conscious feeling.

Our fullest emotional selves integrating imagination, intuition, feeling and sensation is the way in which we embrace who it is we are, our humanity, with courage and humility. It is in this space of allowing ourselves to be fully human and experientially navigating our world with a heightened awareness of being and feeling, that we accept all that is being offered with gratitude and grace.

As we stand in this space of our truest selves, staring out and seeing one another for who we are, finding the authenticity of spirit in one another; we see beyond the facade   and directly into the reflection of ourselves and the magnificence of our universe.