A Prayer of Release/A Prayer of Welcoming

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, changes, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, Energy, faith, fear, forgiveness, healing, health, heart, heart path, humanity, inspiration, letting go, light, listening, love, peace, Seeing, soul, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, Understanding, universal heart, Vulnerable

Where there was fear before

There is no more

Where the was pain before

There is no more

Where there was shame before

There is no more

Where there was guilt before

There is no more

Where there was heartbreak before

There is no more

Where there was anger before

They is no more

I release these energies that have held me hostage for so long. I release these energies that have crippled my dreams, broken my heart and have alas broken me down. I release you all and open my heart to the unknown.

Where there is no more

May there be love

Where there is no more

May there be peace

Where there is no more

May there be light

Where there is no more

May there be hope

Where there is no more

May there be healing

Where there is no more

Let there be magic

Open Roads Meeting The Feet

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, changes, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, Creative Flow, faith, heart, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, learning, lessons learned, light, listening, Magic, observations, sharing, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, thoughts, universal consciousness, universal heart, Vulnerable, well being, Wonder

Throughout my life I have had the wildest belief that I would always be ok. I never really questioned how I would make it or get along for myself. Faith just seemed to be something that was akin to the essence of who I was that to question never crossed my mind.

Living in the moment with the belief that life would take care of itself has always worked out even if I had no idea where I was headed. As a young adult I just followed my heart in everything I did and fell into roles, opportunities and career paths. Because I listened to my heart, the path listened too.

I had no idea dance would ever be such a big part of my life. No clue that I would end up where I am today at this moment helping other movement lovers find their bliss in a body falling through space. Not to mention helping folks find their voice in the creative art of dance making. But somehow, by listening to the heart and believing in life and therefore myself, I am here.

Most of the opportunities I fell into were simply because I chose love over someone else’s path or traditional professional trajectory. Not in the least bit. On the contrary, I just fell. And when I did fall, all I did was learn to listen. Despite the challenges or hardships; listening was the way I was able to make sense of it all.

And fall I did; on my face, my hands and knees, my back, my front and tumble upside down at mind numbing speeds. I fell and was always caught by love. The heart always seemed to land me on my feet and just before the landing being the path underneath me once again.

I never dreamed I would be in dance. Never dreamed I would be a healer. Never dreamed I would be an artistic director. Never dreamed I would be a professor. Never dreamed I would travel the world because of it. Never dreamed I would create an alignment system that would profoundly change so many peoples lives. And yet, I continue to choose to fall.

And now, it seems like it is time for another fall. It feels as though I am on the edge of a release to once again change my own world simply by having the faith to say yes and to once again accept that the universe will always care for me and surround me in love. I have always walked with angels by my side. This I know.

And so it is with this fate that I open my heart to say yes to whatever opportunity might come my way. Whatever will fall into place and into an existence that is so unexpected and so undeniably right now; then so it shall be. I choose to fall and I choose to once again be placed on a path that will most certainly change my world and perhaps others as well.

When All is Lost, Sit.

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, Creativity, Energy, faith, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, lessons learned, love, meditation, sitting, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, universal consciousness, universal heart, Vulnerable, well being

I believe I have about hit that wall where there is nothing much more to give, do or believe possible in this current reality. At several moments during this day I had to simply shut down in lieu of any other response. With nothing left, no answers to what to do next, I did the only thing I could think of; sit.

After all of the remembering to breathe. After all the forgiveness, the only thing left to do was to sit, close the eyes and let go. And so I did.

Even though I have been sitting in meditation for over 160 days, knowing it has been the only thing that has gotten me this far or kept me going; I still have not been able to embrace the kind of reality change necessary to find the freedom that my spirit desires and that my purpose matches.

I realize that if I am to really find what my heart and spirit is longing for and has been longing for, I have to find a new way of being and living in this world. It is time for a new way of participating in my life and to let go of the many habits and patterns that have not been serving me for some time. It is time for a dark night of the soul kind of change which will shift the understanding of myself and challenge the way others have perceived me for so very long. It’s time for a new life.

Do I know what this life is? No. Do I know how it is all going to happen? No. But what I do know is this current reality is not supportive of the peace my spirit craves and the love that my heart also craves to be in alignment with who I am. And in truth, who I have always been but have sacrificed for the past twenty years.

Do I regret the journey? No. Much has come from the path I have been on. And yet, at a very high price. Much has been accomplished. And yet, much has been lost. Much has been shared and many lives and bodies transformed. And yet, fighting to make that happen has been incongruent with who I really am.

And so I sit today to let go. I sit tomorrow to let go and listen. I sit the day after and beyond to quiet my mind, still the heart, forgive myself and wait for the whispers of the Universe to reach out and take hold of my hand. After all this time moving, sitting is really where the salvation is.

Open Your Heart And Love Will Flow In

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allowing, Believing, bliss, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, gay, heart, hope, journey, joy, love, male love, patience, Soul to Soul, spirit, universal heart

This journey as of late has really been such a delight. Time and time again I am reminded of the brilliance of being in the flow and letting go to allow. This transformation through the simple act of healing the heart and learning to love again has given me back so much light in my life.

I am super grateful to be repairing the pain. Grateful to be healing the holes. Grateful to be recalibrating the vibration and letting the heart beat freely once again. Love is the most healing of all energy and should not be shut out but rather unleashed and set free to allow the greatest healing of all.

And wouldn’t you know, out of the blue, love waltzed into my heart and has been a brilliant light. Yes, in all of this healing there must have been a trigger of the resonance and brought the sharing of love in my direction. It has been a delight to begin a journey with a lovely man with whom is such a positive energy and beautiful spirit.

I am grateful for this spirit who shared so much of his world and is teaching me new things I never dreamed of learning. It’s a new language and a new way of being that I thought long gone and passed the point of a possibility. But in fact, love builds on momentum and heals with a force greater than anything else. And for this, I believe in magic and miracles. All of which made possible by love.

Celebrating Change

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, bliss, choice, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, healing, health, heart, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, learning, life, light, love, Love Between Men, loving, patience, peace, Soul to Soul, universal heart, Vulnerable, well being, wellness

There is a lot to be said for navigating dark waters. It’s scary. It’s difficult. There never seems to be movement forward. It’s exhausting both physically and mentally. It often feels as if this is the worst thing that could possibly be happening.

Yet, ironically, this is the best time. This is a time of the unknown. This is literally a gift that is signaling immense change and immense growth. This is actually a time to celebrate. This is a time of great healing that will transform your life for the better and create a new opportunity that will welcome joy, happiness, love and light.

This is your time. The is the time of new beginnings. This is a time of storing the murky water to actually allow it to settle more clearly. It is not the time to fight or to struggle. That never works in quick sand nor does it work in times of darkness. What does work is a change of focus and a change of mind.

Softly begin to shift how you see things. Gently allow yourself to celebrate your courage to actually welcome change. Recognize that you are a gentle warrior and your sword is that of love. For no matter what is happening, love will always pave the way with grace, dignity and light. No matter what, if you choose love as your point of view, at the end of your struggle you will be left with the love you invited in. And trust that love always wins. Especially when it comes to the love that is meant for you.

Fear Not The Sharing of Your Heart

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, bliss, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, dreams, Ecstasy, Existence, faith, fear, forgiveness, growth, heart, heart path, hope, inspiration, journey, joy, love, Magic, sharing, soul, spirit, universal heart, well being, wellness

Fear not the sharing of your heart, it is what the heart is made to do.

The heart itself has its own protection due to its magnificent design. The pericardium surrounds the heart encasing it to let it do it’s work.

So fear not the need to hold back out of fear or rejection; your heart is safe.

Since it’s very first beat, it has been sustaining you and pumping energy, breath and life. It keeps you in the flow and pulse of being simply by being itself. It has never given up on you.

So fear not the hearts fortitude and it’s commitment for keeping you well.

Throughout all of your early relationships, your heart automatically knew how to make connection as you entrained and grew its own magnetic field.

So fear not the hearts ability to connect and draw those close with whom are willing to listen.

Despite the conditioning of your journey; cultural, systemic or human dogma, your heart has always instinctively known who you are, dreamed to be and known you could be. It beats as your own innate drum.

So fear not standing out from the crowd and making the noise of your creation; the unique vibration, your unique vibration of love.

Even if folks have come and gone and life has not blessed you with the love you dreamed, there has always been love and will always be love surrounding you. In fact, love is the pericardium of your life. Love us in fact a magnetic field surrounding and connecting and protecting your very physical and energetic self.

Fear not that you have hurt and felt the pain and sorrow in which often is sustained by deep heartfelt connection; the heart is never scarred, only the ego.

Know that the heart will always beat in your favor welcoming the best for and wanting to connect with others. Know that it is up for another journey with a spirit who is willing the adventure of joy, bliss and ecstasy.

Fear not the sharing of the heart, it is the gift of connection that we are given to speak our story and change our world.

Dreaming the Divine

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, bliss, body, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Energy, faith, heart, heart path, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, letting go, life, light, listening, love, loving, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, universal consciousness, universal heart, well being

Let me dream the divine so that I accept the divine as mine.

May I know the oneness of both the divine self and the self I have held hostage due to the ways of the world.

May this awareness and knowing grant me the courage to let go of being held hostage and allow myself to have faith in the divine being I am.

Let me accept the divinity as the self and trust that the energies of the universe flow through me, transform me into my highest self and reconnect me to all that is and all that has ever been and ever will be.

140 Days of Sitting

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, beleif, Believing, bliss, body, change, changes, compassion, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, Creative Flow, Creativity, Dance, development, Energy, faith, health, heart, heart path, hope, humanity, inspiration, journey, learning, letting go, life, light, listening, love, Mindful Action, patience, peace, sharing, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, Teaching, universal consciousness, universal heart, well being, Wonder

Today marks the 140th day of a meditation practice that I began as a 40 day challenge. To say that this time has been transformative would be completely denying the fullness of what sitting in peace has done for me. I am incredibly grateful for choosing to sit and practice my spiritual journey and do so with a commitment I have not had in decades.

Somewhere along the way of becoming I got lost in the going. Dreams, desires and societal and cultural expectations simply knocked me off balance. That of course is understandable when we succumb to the illusion of the busyness of being. We are sold that to be busy is to be successful. To be busy is to be validated. This is especially true in academia where I live to butter my bread.

Drifting through a sea of disillusionment it is easy to get lost when the goals are not congruent or in alignment with the true vibration of you. We think to know and yet what matters most is that we should feel to know and better yet, understand. And as the rocks tumble in this avalanche of despair we are seeing all around us, we see and feel how fear seems to be getting the best of us.

I made a conscious choice to heal while Covid ravaged our very existence. In a time of heightened fear, I chose freedom. In a time of chaos, I chose quietude. In a time of heartbreak, I chose healing. This is the key element in allowing ourselves the time and space to heal ourselves of the hurt, shame, trauma and fear that we have been collecting as well as spreading. For one can’t but help hurt others of in fact they are hurt themselves. Choosing to break the cycle of pain takes the courage to make the choice for change.

I realize not everyone believes in meditation nor is it part of many belief systems. Yet, what is part of all spiritual paths is the simple thread of the power of love that is woven through them all. For me, meditation has been a way to return to loving myself and therefore all those around me. Perhaps your path is different in the form of finding oneself, but regardless, sitting in meditation and opening the magnetic field of love that emanates from the heart is what allows for magic, wonderment and awe.

There have been many transformative, synchronistic and enchanted moments during these past 140 days. For this my heart is grateful. My body is also grateful. In addition, the energy I live in continues to make me giddy with ecstasy like I have not felt in years.

From where I sit now, all I can see is possibility. As I heal, I grow. As I grow, I become. As I become, I am able to welcome all that is in true alignment with the most beautiful vibration of me and the me that I can be. I accept and allow to do more good, no, more great in the world. I have it to give. And so I shall.

When The Heart Is Open, There Shall Be Blooms

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acceptance, allowing, becoming, Believing, bliss, body knowledge, change, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, energies, Energy, faith, heart, heart path, love, Love Between Men, loving, Soul to Soul, spirit, universal consciousness, universal heart, well being

It occurred to me today after a spin through the house that there are more orchids in bloom at one time than I have had in a long time or can even remember. It moved me quite a bit when the flash of insight passed highlighting that perhaps it could very well be due to all of the opening and blossoming of my own heart.

Could it be that the orchids are all reflecting/mirroring what it is I am feeling with all of this glorious heart work and healing? Could it be that when our energy shifts into the space of unconditional loving in all aspects of our doing, being and actions that the same energy is felt in the orchids themselves?

A wave of gratitude and grace passed over me and in fact a swelling of even more love seemed to fill and in fact overflow from my heart. And now, every time I pass one of them my heart seems to grow that much bigger and the arteries seem to flow with a freedom simply for admiring their beauty and their joy.

It made me wonder if in fact I might be in bloom again myself. Meaning, I wonder if I appear with that kind of beauty and grace to others who know or don’t know who I am? Oddly I had a young man chat me up last week and called me hottie Scottie. Struck me as a little odd but tickled me as well. Much like I am tickled by the beauty of the blooms I share my space with today.

I wonder how much more beauty can be shared by myself and the energies of my space? I wonder how much unconditional love I am capable of letting flow through this unabashed heart? I am giddy with the notion of thinking that perhaps this kind of love and energy is in fact endless since love is eternal.

Oh the joy of giving ourselves over to love and letting love be the champion of all of our lives and all of our dreams. So much gratitude for feeling the hope of love eternal once again and for finding the courage to open up and be vulnerable despite the moment of living we are currently in. May there be an endless flow for you and may you see your own beauty and grace reflected back to you in your own transformative blossoming.

Remembering The Joy Of You

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allowing, becoming, Believing, change, Conscious Living, courage, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, faith, growth, heart, humanity, inspiration, journey, joy, letting go, life, light, love, Mindful Action, Soul to Soul, spirit, spirituality, universal consciousness, universal heart, Vulnerable, well being

There often seems to be moments as of late when I am reminded of so many of the joys that have somehow escaped my life and I have unfortunately missed for some time. For so many of us, our lives get so busy and so focused that we lose track of the simple joys that filled our hearts and our bodies with such positive energy and happiness. Lately, by taking conscious time out for myself, I am started to feel those joys returning. And for this I am grateful.

Oddly, this isn’t as if I am searching to go back to something, but it is more like I am remembering the essence of who I am and the joys are deeply connected to that reminder. I look back over the past ten years and can see the slow numbing of the energy within that brought so many of those joys to life. During that time I lost the compass of my spirit and therefore the joys that were simple a part of the essence of my being.

Now, as I allow myself to fulfill my true nature, all of a sudden the things that brought so much joy are now re-emerging into so many aspects of my life. Fear, anger, shame and guilt are very powerful and suffocate our joys and the heartbreaking thing is that we often don’t realize it while in a state of hurt, grief or disappointment. But I assure you, the joys are still there albeit they may be presently unseen.

In fact, the joys never left you. Nor the essence of your true being. The noise, the conditioning, the chaos and the turmoil of the current moment may have buried them so deeply, but I assure you, the light of you is still there. It is your sacred energy and as we all know, you do not destroy energy, it is just transformed.

So in reality, if it was transformed once, it can be transformed again. Yes! You can return to the light if you but not by going back, but by going forward. Forge ahead so that you can meet yourself once again. Forge ahead so that you can walk in the light of you. Forge ahead so that your dreams can once again see the light of day. And remember, it is never too late.