Revealing the Light

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changes, courageous heart, Courageous Vulnerability, development, Existence, fear, friends, humanity, inspiration, learning, lessons learned, life, light, love, sharing, society, thoughts, truth, Vulnerable, vulnerablitiy, Writing

There is light within us all. Regardless of where we come from, what we believe, who we are or what we have done; light resides in each and every one of us and animates our souls. Sometimes this is hard to feel and to know as so many are struggling with so much and simply moving through the day is often a huge weight to bear. And yet, I assure you there is light within. After all you are the light of the universe and that light is in the very essence of your DNA.

So how does one journey to reveal the light within? How is it that we can find a way to peel away the institution of crippling fear? There is no simple answer nor direct path, but there is a place to start. That starting point is learning to claim your light by recognizing that vulnerability is your greatest asset as well as the seed of what makes you uniquely you and gives authenticity to your voice as a beautiful light filled human being with something to offer this world.

Yes, vulnerability is the place where you must live to stand in the face of your fear. Standing on the legs of a courageous heart takes work and it takes pride. Be proud of what you are even if it is not the same as the people around you or like any other person you know. Be proud to state your name, your love, your vision and your truth. Be mindful not to hide away what you deem to be unworthy or not good enough. Doing so will hold you back from what your soulful desires actually are.

As a child I lived in a place of vulnerability and truth but allowed the world around me swallow that innocence and love. Scolded and shamed into no longer trusting the instincts and visions, a young boy became a young man who hid away what others did not understand or even know possible. Hiding the abilities that have been so graciously given strangles the very nature of our true being. And if we are not living in our most honest and vulnerable selves, we are no longer living because we no longer live in the presence of unconditional love. We no longer reside in the place of self love that is necessary for every single relationship we encounter be it romantic and otherwise.

So now I stand in courageous vulnerability to face the fears that have overcome the child within and the wisdom of the heart. Fear is no longer welcome when light shines on its darkness. When light shines it creates shadow. On the other side of shadow is a place for fear for we need to know it is there at all times but our awareness of it is partly what powers and empowers us to stand and face it. Peeling back the layers of a closed heart will release the light that lives in the spirit of the heart. We can stand firmly in the face of fear when we realize there is no greater place to live our lives than to be standing in the face of courageous vulnerability.

And as I challenge you, I challenge myself. As I turn to face my own fears I encourage you to do the same. Yet, do it in the ways that make sense to you and in the ways that feel right for you. We all own our own fears and therefor need to face and embrace them in the ways that work for us. Welcome tiny steps to build the kind of momentum that will transform your being. After all, momentum favors the willing. Be willing and therefor you will be. Be and you shall become.

Reveal the light that you are.

The entire light.

My Beautiful Friend/A Majestic Light

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best friends, faith, forever friends, friends, friendship, humanity, life, light, listening to the heart, love, loving, truth

My heart is with you as you move through this day to reach outside of yourself in order to follow your heart. You have journeyed deeply into places not of your choosing but simply out of necessity and out of the desire to love and to heal so many. You are in a space of transformation and because of that evolution, a place of great deepening and healing.

You are about to move beyond the person you have known yourself to be and to blossom into yet another bright element of yourself. I have been honored to witness you and your continued magic as you tirelessly give, love and breathe your majestic light. Although I may not have been by your side physically, I have been in your heart with my heart loving you quietly and unconditionally by simply wishing your success with whispers of the heart.

I am with you today as I am with you always; watching you succeed for yourself and for your well being. I am proud to be and have been your friend. I am honored to have been on this journey of ebb and flow. You are my beautiful friend and a majestic light for me. In the dark I can see you and I know all will be right. And for that, I am most humbly grateful.

You have changed the world because I have witnessed how you have changed me. You have changed those who have witnessed your light. Go and shine your light. You will always succeed. Always. No fear when you are the light.

Thirty Day’s of Thoughts: Day 12

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animals, changes, development, dogs, Earth, friends, humanity, inspiration, lessons learned, life, me, observations, thoughts, truth, zen dog

There will always be dogs. For me anyway. This past week with my two boys, Baxter and Bradford, have simply been divine. I have been on spring break and had my first stay-cation for this break for the first time in 16 years and I loved it. Much of that due to being with my boys. What they do for me, what dogs do for us, is simply incredible. And for that, I am grateful. Because of them, I can safely say, there will always be dogs in my life.

Even as I write, my boys are on the couch with me hanging out to be as close as possible. We find ourselves here in this little “cocoon” often as it seems the easiest place to come together and relax with one another while we do our things. More so when I am doing all sorts of writing, reading or watching a movie. It is our sacred space where we find ourselves in our “spots” in which somehow helps reaffirm our place in our pack and establishes a calm for us all. Here we let go and reconnect with ourselves and with one another.

I have recently shifted things in my life and I have begun to challenge myself and being a better Pop Pop for my boys. I had gotten so busy and tangled I found myself only letting them out to hang out or do their business. For some time now I have committed to walking them much more. At least two times a day and on the good days, three. I have also tried to take them on an adventure day where we drive to a place they don’t get to go on a regular basis but stimulates them in so many ways. Baxter LOVES the water and if there is the chance to find some place where he can sneak his feet, we do. And of course his shadow Bradford follows as he can’t stand to be left out.

I have found this decision to focus on being a better dad has made a profound shift in their energies as well as their need to be closer. I have found them to be so much calmer in the house as well as with others. They were terrific during my wine tasting birthday party with the house full of people. I think that in itself was a little overwhelming honestly but for the most part, they were a delight. Well behaved and super affectionate with all the guests. I think they were happy when everyone left their cave and they could have me back to themselves. They slept well that night. We all slept well.

These changes and these commitments have had a significant impact on me as well. I am out in the world more walking and taking in the neighborhood and nature on our adventures. I am reminded how much being out with them recharges me and allows me time and space to think, feel and open up my heart to the creative process. Yes, so many ideas have come to the forefront of my thinking because of spending more time with my boys. You might even say they are a part of the creative team that allows for all of the things I am able to do and discover. They assist in creating a safe space to be creatively vulnerable and quiet myself to listen to what the universe is whispering. They are my tuning forks allowing me to hear what is being shared.

My life is because of my boys. My life is because of the dogs in my life. Before these two, there were two others, Basil and Anise. They were from a different life in a different state and a different state of being. They were the first that made me realize I had purposefully chosen a life with dogs over a life that allowed ultimate freedom to do and to become. In choosing them, I had to choose a life that would creatively create a space for myself and my children in a way that most performers lives do not allow. I would always have to think of them as I had opportunities to accept or reject. There were many opportunities lost, but the choices made, made me. And for this I am grateful to them and grateful for them.

When they passed they took with them my love and my respect. They took over a decade of growth and development as well as the heart ache that the growth created. Oddly, the released what held me to a past and took with them much anger and so much fear. It’s as if they carried my sorrow so that I could be free to once again reach within to open up for more; more of me, more of life, more opportunity and more dreams. There love still lives inside of me because they took away the noise of the past. And because of that love, they allowed me to love again.

Now I am blessed with two beautiful boys who do for me what Basil and Anise had done. These boys remind me on a daily basis to reach down and connect. The remind me to stop and to listen. They remind me to look within so that I might see what is right in front of me. The remind me to live and they remind me to love. Even greater than that, they remind me to be patient with myself and with others because of their infinite forgiveness and  unconditional love.

More than ever, as busy as I am and as full as my life is with so much creative abundance and incredible prosperity, they bring me back to the essentials of being human. They already know the things that matter for us. They have mastered the art of being and are here at our side to help us find it as well. And for this I am grateful and humbled by their love. And this is why, for me, there will always be dogs.

Thirty Day’s of Thoughts: Day Eleven

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art, faith, friends, friendship, humanity, inspiration, lessons learned, life, me, sharing, thoughts, truth

I didn’t know those words meant so much. I had no idea the actions made touched so deeply. I was unaware that the energy that I carried spoke to you. I am grateful my presence in your life in some way has made an impact. It was never my intention to be anything or do anything other than what was right. To treat others with respect and dignity was what I thought we did for one another. I didn’t realize its significance.

As funny as social media is, as difficult and divisive as it has become, I still see the light within. I have been reminded of late by those from my world both present and past about what things have stood out about our interactions and our friendships. I am often surprised by the memories they carry or how much things meant to them. Surprised because for me, I just thought it was natural or just the way it should be.

When I am reminded of such wonderful memories, I am touched so deeply. I often wonder about decisions I have made and choices that have shaped my life. I ponder about the path I have chosen and the course of the waters that have carried me into this amazing life. I don’t question the direction but rather, why me? Why is it I see as I do? Why is it I feel so much? Why am I moved to tears of empathy when I should be stronger? Why am I able to do what others do not know is even possible?

When others share with me their memories of us, I am humbled again and again. I am reminded to keep on doing what I am doing without question and without fear. There is something at work here and it needs a vessel to do its work. There is something that needs to be shared and it needs a platform. Be that platform be making dances, making dancers, writing pages, singing a song or healing the body and the heart, it needs to be expressed.

And so I will. And so I do. And so I am grateful that our paths have crossed in some way that has brought you light. May our paths cross again so we can share that light once again in a smile or an embrace that expresses the gratitude we share. I didn’t know my experiences mattered, but I hope to keep on making what little difference I can.

Ever Grateful for YOU!

Back to the Air

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dance amaranth, friends, love, new family, tour, travel

I sit here waiting to board a flight through Chicago en route to Denver. As I wait I realize I am once again on the road with dance. I also breathe in gratitude for that ability and that abundance.

I have been on the road with move t in the heart of my bones many times this year. More gratitude. And even better, I have the honor of fulfilling a dream rounding all this travel out with the grand finally of China. Life is wonderful!

The other beautiful thing about all of this is the fact that I get to be with “family”. This family is a non-traditional family made of beautiful spirits full of magic, talent, grace and love. It is a managerie of brilliance that I get to share the enchanted world of dance with.

Because dance is a community activity, one must be careful to walk with those that believe in the power and wonderment of movement and who understand that it is through movement that we understand our humanity. And Amaranth is humanity in motion.

So once again the sky calls for kinetic majesty. I am honored that I get to respond with a resounding yes! I hear you majestic mystery of energy and I shall listen as I create and ride the river of the dances that you wish to share to our humble hearts.

Move by by movement we shape the energy of space to sculpt ephemeral bliss.

Reflections on a Rehearsal

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artists, Ballet, choreographer, choreography, Conscious Living, contemporary dance, creative process, dance makers, dance making, enchantment, friends, Grateful, heart path, Magic, Modern, process, Soul to Soul, thankful

There are times when moments are taking place and you realize time is slowing down a bit in order for you to see very clearly that all is well and right in your world. Yesterday during my day of class was very much like this. There was so much time to work so deeply that I was able to step back in my spirit and realize how glorious this all is.

I am grateful to be able to live such a luxurious life in the arts. It is not everyday that one gets to immerse themselves fully in all they love being surrounded by people who give themselves and their hearts so fully to the things they love also. It is an honor to be able to be allowed to make-work and walk the path of magic as dances reveal themselves for the first time or are reborn to speak again.

When I am in the studio, I am in church. I am in a sacred place of worship with the divine dreaming of all that a body can do, become and realize in choreography.  This is such an enchanted space, a mystical foray into the heart and mind of the creative energetic river. How grateful I am to be able to be a dream keeper of dance in this way. I am honored to be one of many who dive deeply into the ocean, swimming with the currents and riding the tides of this creative universe.

I also find myself fortunate enough to be on my heart path with some very remarkably talented and spirited people. We all walk our own ways merging with one another in the work while supporting one another’s individual voices and gifts. It is not often that one gets to be fulfilled by the magic their friends bring to the process, in both physicality and the richness of their hearts.

I was so moved in rehearsal yesterday by the enchanted ways in which the work seemed to pour out of the deep muscle memory of the dancers. It was as if the work lingered in the well of their musculature as they conjured up the kinetic imagery inside of themselves that collectively is being reborn as “Creek Walkers under a Waning Moon”.

I look forward to when the dance emerges once again to inhabit the space energetically kept by the dancers and absorbed into the hearts and mind of the audience. This makes me wonder if dance is as ephemeral as we all think it is. I think the dances I help to bring to life have physicality to them kept alive in the bodies of dancers and the souls of the people who have let the work be absorbed into the fibers of their beings.

This is my goal is as a dance maker; to make the kind of work that resonates as a meaningful experience opening a doorway to consciousness that bridges the spirit to walk more deeply into the center of our beings. It is important to actualize work that is humanity in motion and dance alchemy speaking to our enchanted hearts.

Running on Joy

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colleagues dancers, friends, honor, joy, laughter, love, spirit, work

During the past 5 weeks I have found myself exhausted on several occasions. Despite burning the candle at both ends to make several new works, teach an incredible load, as well as present at a conference; life seemed to be just fine and taking care of itself in some of the most beautiful ways. With all of this, there somehow remained a sense of joy and peace throughout the entire process.

Much of this joy is due to the people who surround me. I am grateful for the dancers I work with and the laughter and forgiveness they embody. It is such an honor to work with beautiful people who make space in their hearts and their lives to work together and make great art. It is apparent that this is the space where joy lives.

In other instances, there were collaborators who softened their hearts and ego’s to allow for a true communication resulting in letting the work speak for its beautiful self while having faith in one another and each others process. Here is where many gifts of joy are exchanged.

And lastly, while all of these worlds were spinning, my head clouded by the chaos of the “to do” list, and the lack of “Scott” time, I somehow realized that this frenetic place of being is really where we feel joy the most. This sweet spot of quiet that limited time allows simply because it forces us to be present while honoring the work we are doing. We have no time to comment, be negative or lose sight of what must be.

Beauty must be and it can only be if there is joy.